Newsflash
Courtesy, The Onion
Planet Explodes
EARTH--All Earth lifeforms are feared dead in Monday's explosion of
the four-billion-year-old planet, sources report. "We are still
searching through the rubble for any signs of life which may be
present," said American Red Cross volunteer Patricia O'Donnell.
"But we stress that the hope of retrieving survivors is quite
slim." A research mishap at Long Island's Brookhaven National
Laboratories is believed responsible for the catastrophic explosion.
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Gordon Smith
National Center for Physical Acoustics
Coliseum Drive
University, MS 38655
slipstk@olemiss.edu